[ Okay, this is getting weirder and weirder but Bobby takes the gloved hand anyway and shakes it. He still has a confused expression on his face, if not a bit of a clear hesitance because he doesn't know what to make of this man. ]
Nice to meet you, Wade. [ You know, given the circumstances and all that. When he pulls his hand away, his brows furrow. ]
How... [ Hm, how to even phrase this. ] How do you know who I am? Are you from the same world as I am but from a different time? [ Like Erik. ] Or are you from another universe who knows a version of me? [ Like Ororo and Kurt. ]
It's complicated. Something to do with Disney buying Fox. [ And without any sensical explanation, he's already moving on. Moving his hands from one end of the bar to the other in front of him. ] Think of me as your world... adjacent.
[ More to come after his canon update. ]
I'm usually on-screen with Colossus and Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Oh, and how can I forget Yukio!
[ At least one of those names should be familiar. Wade crosses his arms over the bar, lazily draping one over the other. ]
I've been to the mansion loads of times. I guess I just keep missing you. Fancy that. Can I have a cranberry-grapefruit-vodka? [ It's called a Sea Breeze, Wade. ]
[ None of what Wade just said actually made sense to him. Disney? Fox? He can understand being world adjacent to whatever world this one came from because he knows the multiverse is actually a thing.
But one name does stand out and Bobby's quick to note it. ] Colossus? You know him? [ And another familiar thing. ] And you also know the mansion, huh? How?
[ How can this guy just keep missing him? Is that even possible? Oh, well. Bobby does nod when Wade orders a Sea Breeze. He'll correct him later. It doesn't take long for him to prepare it, knowing all the ingredients and where they are in the bar. So after a while, he hands the drink to Wade, the glass immediately chilling in his grasp. ]
[ Wade can feel the awkwardness hedging him in and his own attempts at small talk are like a feeble flame fighting against the encroaching darkness of his own fucking making. Still, it's hard to switch it off, yeah? Inwardly, he has a mini panic attack. Outwardly? He doubles down. ]
Biblically? [ No, but he does know Colossus. ] Yes. He doesn't like to talk about it, but we have a special bond.
[ Wade wiggles his fingers before he accepts the glass, then shoves his mask halfway up his face, revealing a piteous display of massive scar tissue covering every inch of exposed skin, from nose to nape of his neck. ]
Ohohoho! See, that's where the magic happens! You can't beat a drink that's chilled with your ability, no fucking way! [ He takes a sip, but sets it down. ] How long have you been here -- in Fucksville, I mean?
[ Bobby just... listens to Wade talk more about everything, really. He's trying to somehow search his memories for anything that might clue him in on who this guy is but nothing. Not even a tiny hint. But Bobby's polite and it doesn't show on his features that he's uncomfortable or awkward. He's just honestly very confused right now. Wade might really be from another version of his Earth and there's another Bobby there or something. The multiverse might really be infinite, who's to say? Also, to be fair, he doesn't have a close relationship with Colossus either, so he doesn't know if the guy's actually friends with Wade.
So he'll choose to address his question first. ]
Three months now, actually. [ Shrugs. ] Feels longer, though, to be honest. But that's just how it is here. [ A pause. ] And I take it you just recently arrived, huh?
[ So rude how X-Men just ghost him like that. Then again, there was the whole rights issue. ]
Yep. [ Wade lifts a finger and then levels it to the pleather collar fitted around his neck, the mask tucked under it. ] Landed in the Sub Club.
[ Wade reaches up and begins to roll his mask up so he can enjoy his Sea Breeze, and soon Bobby will get an eye full of what appears to be a full body burn scar. ]
Three months — wow! And look at you! Are you thriving or surviving?
[ Bobby didn't mind the first time Wade pulled up his mask a little so he doesn't mind either when he pulls it off completely. Yeah, that's a full body burn scar alright. There's no surprise in his features nor disgust whatsoever. People have it rough and that's okay.
He smiles lopsidedly, though, at the mention of Sub Club since he's also wearing his collar. That question also makes him shake his head in amusement. ]
Both, I guess? I try to thrive so I can survive, basically. Or else I'm gonna lose my mind in this place.
[ Bobby's nice. Wade takes a swallow of the crisp cranberry-forward drink and pulls a face. Wade hasn't quite experienced the full weight of that boot on his neck but he will soon. ]
Yeesh.
[ It does beg the question, after having met so many Avengers and X-Men and other people with powers, it's alarming that all that power has been so effectively brought to heel from both sides of the power dynamic fence. ]
It's kinda superhero-y here, I'm surprised there hasn't been some big uprising amongst you goody-two-shoe types.
[ The mention of an uprising has Bobby frowning a little, grabbing a wash cloth as he proceeds to clean a glass. ]
There has been before, many times. But this place is creative when it comes to punishments. They depower us here, humiliate us, throw us in jail, or make us hurt the ones we care about.
[ Penelope's punishment is just mild compared to the public flogging and lashing he has seen on the network last month. ]
[ Wade's brows shoot up at that. Well, it's more of a wrinkling of that area without any brows to speak of. ]
Depowering, great. Love that for us.
[ It would be a fucking death sentence for him. ]
Guess that means I'm gonna have to be on my bestest behavior! The zoo, though — sounds like a fun time in a 50 Shades kinda way, ever been?
[ Sorry, Bobby, this is probably not a great conversation to have, particularly when said in such a lighthearted tone, a gloved finger delicately tracing the rim of his glass like he's flirting. ]
[ Bobby does note how he traces the rim of his glass after he says that and is almost disturbed he's flirting with People Zoo in mind, but. He'll keep the tone from getting too dark. Also, he doesn't know what 50 Shades is supposed to even mean. ]
No, and I don't plan to. [ A pause, his tone turning a little adamant. ] And you shouldn't either. It's a bad place. [ He cares, okay. ] They'll rent you out while depowered. Any Dom will have free reign over you. Who knows what they'll do to you because that's not exclusive only to sex.
[ They can beat you up, make you eat shit, anything. It's horrible. Oops, he didn't mean for this to get even darker. There's a level of concern in his blue eyes, though. ]
I'd rather keep my head down than lose my agency like that. Promise you won't go.
[ Some of that sounds fun — it's supremely fucked-up and Wade wishes exactly none of that on anyone, not even that Homelander fella. Actually, that sounds like the kind of thing that could kill him if he's not careful. ]
Spoiler alert!
[ His shoulders shake with laughter. Taking this dark shit pretty damn well, but this doozy is a downright butthole-clenching development. He does not like that one bit. ]
Well, it's a good thing my poor impulse control is the stuff of legends! I'm not totally fucked at all.
[ He's so fucked. ]
How about the contract shit? You're working, so I assume you've bagged yourself a lil dommy daddy? Don't have one myself but if I want to avoid all of that, I'd better start shopping around for a sugar daddy. Or mommy.
[ Well, at least, someone's taking it pretty well. Bobby can't fault the man for that since they have various ways to cope. He's just going to shake his head in both amusement and exasperation. ]
Well, here's hoping you don't get fucked at all. [ And he doesn't mean in a sexual way because Wade seems to enjoy that.
As for his questions - ] I have a Dominant, yeah. My boyfriend, actually. [ He's not going to expand on that since contracts are public knowledge anyway. ] I think it's best not to delay it, but I'll understand any hesitation. Been there, too. It's just worse when you delay it because you pretty much won't get a say on who you get contracted with when your time's up.
[ Wade lifts his glass. Cheers to that! To not getting fucked! Wait. Wade leans his head to the side, then shrugs.
But it's when Bobby gets to that part about arranged contracts that drops another load of reality right on his head. ]
Hate to be the unlucky guy, gal, or pal that lands my pity contract. Hah!
[ He snort-laughs, then lifts the glass to take a very large gulp of his drink. For all his jokes, he's pretty sure he's going to need like three more of those to process that little nugget. ]
Anywho, that's nice! What's his name? I mean I'm totally facebook stalking you later, but I kinda like talking to you!
[ Bobby offers him an empathetic smile, if not a bit lopsided when he says that. Come on, Wade. Don't be so hard on yourself. He's about to tell him this exact same thing when he asks about who his boyfriend is.
Since this guy apparently knows the X-Men, he might be surprised to know who he is. ]
Well, it's Erik. Erik Lehnsherr. [ And before Wade even reacts to that - ] He's not the one from my time. The one here is younger and from a different timeline from mine.
[ Who's McKellen? This guy truly drops the weirdest names and terms. Disney. Fox. Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Bobby doesn't know what to make of these so he just chooses to ignore them, chalking it up to Wade knowing some stuff he doesn't from his own version of Earth. Kind of like the term Krakoa in Ororo and Kurt's.
The questions make him snort a little, making quick work of cleaning all the glasses in the bar by now. ]
Like I said, he's not from my timeline, if that makes sense? He's from the past but he's also on the path of doing better. [ Here, his smile turns a bit fond. ] He has done nothing but take good care of me and protect me. And all of us mutants here, to be honest. I have faith he won't end up like the one I know from my time.
[ That's often the best way to deal with Deadpool. Ignore half of what he says as useless exposition and confusing commentary. Wade props his head up against his hand, elbow on the bar — leaning into it a little when he sees that cute little smile spread on Bobby's face. Awwww! ]
Now that's what I'm talking about! I guess something good came out of this shithole after all.
[ He sighs dreamily. Sounds like Erik has been leaning into that protectiveness for all Mutants schtick in a way that just begs to be called 'daddy' a lot. He bets they make a great couple. ]
I hope I get to meet the best Magneto, he sounds great.
[ The way Wade does that gesture makes Bobby chuckle. It's a true silver lining of this place - what he and Erik has. But also, most of his friendships and relationships are also that. Duplicity might be all kinds of fucked up but the bonds one forges with people here make this place bearable. ]
I hope you do, too. Since you're - [ Pauses, contemplates for a bit. ] - also a mutant, right? Since you know us? [ And friends with Colossus? ]
There are a lot of us here, by the way. You might run into them, too.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Nice to meet you, Wade. [ You know, given the circumstances and all that. When he pulls his hand away, his brows furrow. ]
How... [ Hm, how to even phrase this. ] How do you know who I am? Are you from the same world as I am but from a different time? [ Like Erik. ] Or are you from another universe who knows a version of me? [ Like Ororo and Kurt. ]
no subject
[ More to come after his canon update. ]
I'm usually on-screen with Colossus and Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Oh, and how can I forget Yukio!
[ At least one of those names should be familiar. Wade crosses his arms over the bar, lazily draping one over the other. ]
I've been to the mansion loads of times. I guess I just keep missing you. Fancy that. Can I have a cranberry-grapefruit-vodka? [ It's called a Sea Breeze, Wade. ]
no subject
But one name does stand out and Bobby's quick to note it. ] Colossus? You know him? [ And another familiar thing. ] And you also know the mansion, huh? How?
[ How can this guy just keep missing him? Is that even possible? Oh, well. Bobby does nod when Wade orders a Sea Breeze. He'll correct him later. It doesn't take long for him to prepare it, knowing all the ingredients and where they are in the bar. So after a while, he hands the drink to Wade, the glass immediately chilling in his grasp. ]
One Sea Breeze.
no subject
Biblically? [ No, but he does know Colossus. ] Yes. He doesn't like to talk about it, but we have a special bond.
[ Wade wiggles his fingers before he accepts the glass, then shoves his mask halfway up his face, revealing a piteous display of massive scar tissue covering every inch of exposed skin, from nose to nape of his neck. ]
Ohohoho! See, that's where the magic happens! You can't beat a drink that's chilled with your ability, no fucking way! [ He takes a sip, but sets it down. ] How long have you been here -- in Fucksville, I mean?
no subject
So he'll choose to address his question first. ]
Three months now, actually. [ Shrugs. ] Feels longer, though, to be honest. But that's just how it is here. [ A pause. ] And I take it you just recently arrived, huh?
no subject
Yep. [ Wade lifts a finger and then levels it to the pleather collar fitted around his neck, the mask tucked under it. ] Landed in the Sub Club.
[ Wade reaches up and begins to roll his mask up so he can enjoy his Sea Breeze, and soon Bobby will get an eye full of what appears to be a full body burn scar. ]
Three months — wow! And look at you! Are you thriving or surviving?
no subject
He smiles lopsidedly, though, at the mention of Sub Club since he's also wearing his collar. That question also makes him shake his head in amusement. ]
Both, I guess? I try to thrive so I can survive, basically. Or else I'm gonna lose my mind in this place.
oops pre-caffeinated me is very forgetful lmao
Yeesh.
[ It does beg the question, after having met so many Avengers and X-Men and other people with powers, it's alarming that all that power has been so effectively brought to heel from both sides of the power dynamic fence. ]
It's kinda superhero-y here, I'm surprised there hasn't been some big uprising amongst you goody-two-shoe types.
How bad is it?
hehe you're good!
There has been before, many times. But this place is creative when it comes to punishments. They depower us here, humiliate us, throw us in jail, or make us hurt the ones we care about.
[ Penelope's punishment is just mild compared to the public flogging and lashing he has seen on the network last month. ]
no subject
Depowering, great. Love that for us.
[ It would be a fucking death sentence for him. ]
Guess that means I'm gonna have to be on my bestest behavior! The zoo, though — sounds like a fun time in a 50 Shades kinda way, ever been?
[ Sorry, Bobby, this is probably not a great conversation to have, particularly when said in such a lighthearted tone, a gloved finger delicately tracing the rim of his glass like he's flirting. ]
no subject
No, and I don't plan to. [ A pause, his tone turning a little adamant. ] And you shouldn't either. It's a bad place. [ He cares, okay. ] They'll rent you out while depowered. Any Dom will have free reign over you. Who knows what they'll do to you because that's not exclusive only to sex.
[ They can beat you up, make you eat shit, anything. It's horrible. Oops, he didn't mean for this to get even darker. There's a level of concern in his blue eyes, though. ]
I'd rather keep my head down than lose my agency like that. Promise you won't go.
no subject
Spoiler alert!
[ His shoulders shake with laughter. Taking this dark shit pretty damn well, but this doozy is a downright butthole-clenching development. He does not like that one bit. ]
Well, it's a good thing my poor impulse control is the stuff of legends! I'm not totally fucked at all.
[ He's so fucked. ]
How about the contract shit? You're working, so I assume you've bagged yourself a lil dommy daddy? Don't have one myself but if I want to avoid all of that, I'd better start shopping around for a sugar daddy. Or mommy.
no subject
Well, here's hoping you don't get fucked at all. [ And he doesn't mean in a sexual way because Wade seems to enjoy that.
As for his questions - ] I have a Dominant, yeah. My boyfriend, actually. [ He's not going to expand on that since contracts are public knowledge anyway. ] I think it's best not to delay it, but I'll understand any hesitation. Been there, too. It's just worse when you delay it because you pretty much won't get a say on who you get contracted with when your time's up.
no subject
But it's when Bobby gets to that part about arranged contracts that drops another load of reality right on his head. ]
Hate to be the unlucky guy, gal, or pal that lands my pity contract. Hah!
[ He snort-laughs, then lifts the glass to take a very large gulp of his drink. For all his jokes, he's pretty sure he's going to need like three more of those to process that little nugget. ]
Anywho, that's nice! What's his name? I mean I'm totally facebook stalking you later, but I kinda like talking to you!
no subject
Since this guy apparently knows the X-Men, he might be surprised to know who he is. ]
Well, it's Erik. Erik Lehnsherr. [ And before Wade even reacts to that - ] He's not the one from my time. The one here is younger and from a different timeline from mine.
no subject
[ Cue the double-handed gasp. Magneto! ]
Not gonna lie, I'd hit it if it was McKellen too. Well done.
[ But using his name? Full name? That's a twist, maybe that means he's not completely done with humanity. Interesting. ]
Is it weird? I mean — knowing he becomes this absolute baddie doesn't put a weird, sexy strain on your relationship?
no subject
The questions make him snort a little, making quick work of cleaning all the glasses in the bar by now. ]
Like I said, he's not from my timeline, if that makes sense? He's from the past but he's also on the path of doing better. [ Here, his smile turns a bit fond. ] He has done nothing but take good care of me and protect me. And all of us mutants here, to be honest. I have faith he won't end up like the one I know from my time.
no subject
Now that's what I'm talking about! I guess something good came out of this shithole after all.
[ He sighs dreamily. Sounds like Erik has been leaning into that protectiveness for all Mutants schtick in a way that just begs to be called 'daddy' a lot. He bets they make a great couple. ]
I hope I get to meet the best Magneto, he sounds great.
no subject
I hope you do, too. Since you're - [ Pauses, contemplates for a bit. ] - also a mutant, right? Since you know us? [ And friends with Colossus? ]
There are a lot of us here, by the way. You might run into them, too.